That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Someone came in the potted fern
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize