I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
