Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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