these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Randomize
