Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
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