I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
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