And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
my dad came in to wish me a happy birthday and found me passed out in my underwear with the lights on and a plate of meat on the bed. i bet he was proud to have contributed to my creation in that moment.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
