if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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