Your dad touched me again.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize