Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
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