I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize