oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Randomize
