We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
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