I must be too annoying 4 u.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Do vagina's smell?
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Randomize
