I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
