I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
