i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
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