You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
