They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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