just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Randomize
