I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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