My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
