Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
