I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize