You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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