the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
