Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
