he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
