Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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