the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
