We're facebook friends in real life
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Randomize
