her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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