whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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