do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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