Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
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