I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
