somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
