My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
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