did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Actions speak louder than pants.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Randomize
