Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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