'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Randomize
