He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
nutella sex= disaster
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
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