I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
