having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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