Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
