Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Randomize
