I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
