Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
