Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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