don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
